


under the apple tree

by jessamoo



Category: Holby City
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-24
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-11-04 11:42:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,522
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10990218
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jessamoo/pseuds/jessamoo
Summary: they do plant the apple tree, and jasmine comes back home after leaving for st catherine's.





	under the apple tree

Jasmine was out of breath by the time she reached her old street.

She hadn't been doing much excercise lately. She hadn't been doing much of anything lately, except drinking. And maybe crying.

But now she was back walking past all the houses she remembered so well, like it hadn't been two years and she was just coming home after a shift at Holby. She let herself smile. It felt like home, even now. She'd lived in Goa for her whole childhood, but it had never been home. Those small trips to England to see her grandad once every few years, that had come close to feeling like a home. But it was here, with Morven, that she finally found that. It had made her feel safe. Brave, she thought, brave enough to leave it, knowing it was still there. That had been her first mistake.

She'd kept in touch with Morven, of course. Morven was the type of friend that sent you hourly updates of interesting things she'd found on a pavement. But for Jasmine, it hadn't been the same. It had made her too sad, to think about what she had left, what she had missed out on, all because it had seemed easier at the time to pack up and leave. Like always, it eventually became easier for her to just distance herself from it, from Morven. Her best friend didn't need to hear how much she hated it at St Catherine's. She wanted Morven to live her life without worrying about her. Jasmine thought she could cope with it all, if she knew Morv was ok.

She had not coped, obviously. That was why she was here. 

She'd hated it. The people, the work, herself. She had spiralled. The same spiral she never seemed to escape no matter how hard she tried. Her lonliness was a raw wound she never let heal. She nutured it, picked at it, never let it settle.

As she passed more manicured lawns, Jasmine realized, not for the first time, that living by herself had probably not been the best option. She hadn't been used to it. She'd talk out loud to Morven before remembering she wasn't there.

That was around the time she started turning her phone off when she was drunk - which was a lot of the time. She had a history of leaving awkward messages for people when drunk, and Jas had been worried about what she might say to Morven. 

She thought, for example, she might admit that she missed Morven every day since she'd left. Or she might admit she sometimes thought about her when she fell asleep, wishing they were curled up next to each other. Or that sometimes she had strange thoughts, like if the sun was a person it would be Morven. That her best friend's smile was the best thing ever, that she wanted to be with her all the time, that she wanted to know what her hair felt like in her hands.

Jasmine kept it all inside. She carried around with her, on top of all the other baggage.

But still, she'd found her way here again after all this time.

She'd quit St Catherine's about four hours ago, after shouting at her boss - a woman with the personality of her sister Jac but without the talent or cheekbones to excuse it - and then she'd hopped on a train without really thinking about it.

All she'd been able to think was that she wanted to see the tree.

Because the girls had done one of Morven's stupid joke suggestions. After getting permission, they had planted an apple tree at the bottom of their tiny garden the day before Jas had left. It was sort of her last good memory before her life went to hell. Again.

She just wanted to see the tree. She wasn't going to knock on the door or anything, she was just going to look at it for a bit. Here, a bit means 'stand around staring at the tree until it gets weird and people think you're a stalker, then leave'.

The bloody council better not have cut the stupid thing down.

No- No, there it was! Jasmine rounded the corner, and she could see the tree, and their old house, and she had to stop herself running toward it.

She took a deep breath as she stood just a few feet away. The sun poked through the foliage, and it crested the sky above her. The sight of it made her feel calmer than she had in forever. Like she was as strong and real as that tree, like she could root herself to this spot just like that, and nothing would ever knock her down again.

"Jasmine?" An incredulous voice asked.

Jasmine blinked. She'd been so wrapped up in her thoughts she hadn't seen the door open. She didn't even know if Morven still lived there until she stepped out into the sunlight, looking like a dream in a pink summer dress. She was holding up a hand to shield her eyes, and Jas gave her a small, awkward wave.

Then the screaming started. Morven laughed and squealed as she ran up to her, wrapping her arms around her. Jasmine had half expected that if she were to see Morven again there might be some resentment, even outright hostility and abandonment issues. There was none, as Morven jumped around whilst still trying to hug Jasmine, and she had to laugh even though she was probably going to end up with bruises.

"I can't believe it! What are you doing here? I mean, seeing me, obviously, but oh my god!" Morven let out a piercing, shrieking noise, stretching out to the pitch Jas was sure only dogs could hear. And she loved her for it.

"Yeah - seeing you. And the tree. But mostly you, obviously." Jas grinned. She didn't know if it was true or not, now that she had seen her. 

"Uh, good, I'm glad I take precedence over a tree!" Morven finally let go of her. "But I'm surprised they let you out of work. They might as well chain you to the doors you're there so much."

Jasmine scuffed the ground with her shoe before squinting up at Morven. "Yeah, well, about that. I sort of, might of, actually...quit my job?"

Morven's mouth dropped open for a few seconds. "Oh. Right. Well, good for you." She punched Jasmine's arm feebly.

"You have no idea how much I've missed you being a total weirdo." Jasmine sighed happily in resonse.

"I missed you too."

After they had finished hugging again, Jasmine wandered over to the tree, placing her hand on it's rough bark. She turned and leaned against it as Morven followed her a few steps.

"So, the job wasn't for me." Jasmine started. She didn't know what she was going to say or how she was going to say it.

"You should have said, I would totally have come up to see you."

"I know." Jasmine nodded. "But I suppose I didn't want to admit I'd failed, again. That I'd left everything for nothing."

Morven pointed at her. "Not for nothing. Now you know where you want to be, right? So, maybe you had to go there. My dad always says everything happens for a reason."

"Yeah but your dad says it's bad luck to see a black cat." Morven nudged her and she carried on. "Maybe you are right though. On the way here there was something I couldn't get out my head. It was this poem this guy on our ward read all the time to his wife. She was sick and he'd just sit at her bedside all the time and he'd read her this poem every day. I don't remember it all, but I do remember one bit." Jasmine paused, trying to gage her friends reaction. "Come live with me, and be my love."

Morven smiled slowly. She nodded her approval. "That's nice."

Jasmine rolled her eyes. Her heart was beating too fast. It made her feel a little reckless. "Morv, I'm trying to be romantic here you div. Come live with me?" She getured wildly to the house. "And be my love?" Then she gestured to the two of them. Morven looked confused.

Until, that is, she couldn't keep it in any longer. That 500 watt smile spread across her face. "I know you're being romantic Jasmine! I just think it's funny to watch you get flustered."

"Right!" Jasmine blushed. "Right, well, fine then. Fine. That's literally fine. Is it? Fine? That I'm being romantic?" She tried to take a deep breath to calm down.

Morven stepped very close to her. "Yes, Jasmine. It's fine."

She took her hand and laid her forehead against Jasmine's, until their giggles caused their heads to knock together uncomfortably.

"Come on then." Morven pulled at their hands, trying to get Jasmine to come inside.

Jasmine followed gladly, feeling safe again, and warm, and happy, and all those other things she hadn't felt for such a long time.

She was never leaving again.


End file.
